Gossip Girls

Why I'm eager to be done with physical therapy, little-known wives, and a diva's box set.

Hello readers,

How are you? What's new in your world?

Because of the headaches I've been whining and carrying on about, I've been in physical therapy for a couple of weeks. Things are going okay, I guess, but I'm really motivated to get out of there as soon as possible. Why? Physical therapists – or at least the ones I'm encountering – are a real gossipy lot. I'm not kidding you. But here I am telling you this, so I guess this means I'm gossiping about their gossip, which is also not okay (Cue internal conflict music). Still, something I heard this week stopped me in my tracks enough to make me wonder if they talked that way about me when I wasn't there. Do I give anything away about myself or my world or...anything? Surely not. But maybe that doesn't matter.

At any rate, I am determined to be efficient in my healing and circumspect about everything else. To do that, I am going to have to overcome my natural tendency to pay close attention to what's going on around me. I am going to have to do my level best to ignore certain things, or put certain things I hear out of my mind (probably after telling my husband about it over dinner). It's spring, so it'll kind of be like getting into the yard and pulling weeds.

Pulling weeds, as we know, is necessary. You don't want to have your yard – or your mind – overrun with stuff you don't want growing there, especially after having a bunch of stuff done to your neck. Therapy taught me this when I eventually decided to listen, and I love that for me. Sure, I have slip-ups. We all do. But when I focus on clearing out what doesn't belong there, it makes my mental garden a much lovelier place.

Speaking of lovely, my sister sent me this photo of her garden this week.

Note: No weeds in this picture. As a little zine I picked up in Minnesota says: "Weeds always come back. But if you don't nurture them, they won't thrive."

Here's hoping all of your gardens are weed free.

Paige

Writing prompt: Do you have any figurative weeds that keep popping up in your life and mind? Maybe it's self-doubt. Maybe it's regret about a missed opportunity. Maybe it's something else. What is the biggest weed that comes up for you again and again, and what steps can you take to keep that weed at bay?

You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don't try to forget the mistakes, but you don't dwell on it. You don't let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.

-- Johnny Cash

Endnotes

What I'm reading

I just finished Anna Funder's Wifedom: Mrs. Orwell's Invisible Life. The writing is beyond good, and I truly enjoyed reading about George Orwell's little-known and little-talked about wife (who was so instrumental to his success, even though he was just beastly to her, for goodness sake). But I'm still wrestling with how I feel about the hybrid biography/memoir/fictionalized parts approach. Biography and memoir can work well together, I think, and straight-up novelistic writing is fine. But fictionalized parts of what is presented as biography is maybe not fine for me, even as enjoyable as this book was. Has anyone else read this? I'd love to hear what you thought, and/or whether you think I'm being a fuddy duddy about this. Seriously. And more generally, I'd like to hear your thoughts about biography as a whole. What works for you? What doesn't? What would you like to see more of in the genre? Any favorites? Hit reply and let me know what's on your mind.

What I'm watching

RIP Pope Francis. I finally got around to seeing "Conclave" this week (which was great). Who knew cardinals could be as backstabby as teenage girls? Also, what a fantastic ending!

What I'm listening to

My splurge-y, limited edition "Weekends With Adele: Live in Vegas" box set arrived last weekend and it's bringing back fond memories of going to see this utterly fabulous show with my kiddo, who turns 20 next week!

Along those lines, my favorite bit of Adele wisdom...

This bit of real talk didn't come from Adele's Vegas residency. It came from her Munich shows, but as soon as I heard it, it made my recovering people pleaser heart soar. Here goes: "Sometimes someone comes into your life and when they leave and when they're no longer a part of our lives, we desperately try to search for the reason that they came into our life, and I'm telling you the one thing I've really really really come to learn is some people they're not meant to represent anything, they're not meant to do anything for our lives, and not supposed to change us in any way. Some people are just f*&^ing useless." And then of course she cackled and I did too.

A fun online class opportunity

Last spring, I introduced you to my friend, Julie Galle Baggenstoss, who is a flamenco dancer and impresario here in Atlanta. In May, she will be presenting a series of flamenco history classes with award-winning author and flamenco critic, Juan Vergillos. The six-part class begins May 1, and will cover the origins and evolution of flamenco, with a few surprises throughout. Juan will teach in Spanish, with Julie translating and facilitating the Q&A with students. For more information, or to register, please visit Berdole.

Where I hope you'll donate this week

History matters. Please consider a donation to the American Historical Association, which, among other things, promotes the role of historical thinking in public life.